UnderSide

Under Side is what happens when you can't escape anymore. The armor comes off because something real has broken through—loss, grief, the end of something you didn't know you needed until it was gone. The album follows someone through the full arc of loss: the oblivious happiness before the fall, the moment everything shatters, the drowning in grief, the slow, often reluctant crawl back toward light. Act I — Innocence (Before the Fall) Blind Spot — Smooth, funky, oblivious. You never see it coming. Spellbound — Lost in the dream. Everything feels unreal. Baseline — The numbing routine is a death in itself. Something's off; you ignore it. Act II — The Fall The Beginning — The world ends. Someone dies. Everything shatters. Tears — Grief, often raw, sometimes uncontrollable. Buried — The isolation of being under something, even if you don't know you are, or what it is. Act III — Experience (Drowning) Ghosted — If you're buried long enough, you end up haunting your own life. Dangerous Places — Sometimes the realization that we're all unsafe is a spark that starts the fire of recovery. Black Coffee Inside — Climbing back out of your own grave, who wouldn't want a coffee. The Correct Response — An ironic quote of sheer idocy, but... that's what the world sometimes provides us. Titrate — A safe space. Permission to finally fall apart. Drop by drop you let the pain out. Act IV — Awakening Fleurs du Mal — Sometimes awakening is uncomfortable. Familiar things provide no comfort to the grieving. Flowers, at a funeral. Bright Time — Eventually you're forced to see the sun. Life forces you outside. It's often too bright, often too much. Relax — Everyone seems to be going ok, but... there will always be something off. Sometimes — Not always, but sometimes, there are glimpses of hope. Act V — Experience Transformed Long Goodbye — The real goodbye. To the loss, to the grief, to the past. After All — Still here. Not healed, but whole. The love is all that remains, if you can find it. Theme Internal reckoning. What happens when you can't escape because the loss is inside you. The journey from burying grief to finally letting it transform you.

[Intro] [Vinyl crackle] [Verse] [Spoken: male, distracted but something's off] ...yeah, Tuesday works... [Instrumental — 8 bars, funky but uneasy] [Spoken: female, casual surface, tension underneath] ...they're fine, they're always fine... ...ARE THEY FINE?... [Chorus] [Scratch] [Spoken: male, brushing something away] ...that's the key, right there... I mean it... ...I've been meaning to... [Verse] [Spoken: quieter, almost to himself] ...there's time... [Bridge] [Spoken: female, AM radio, too bright] ...same old same OLD... ...same old same OLD... [Build] [Scratch] [Spoken: overlapping, fragments] ...later... ...tomorrow... ...soon... [Chorus] [Spoken: extended voiceover, male, angry] ...what could go wrong. we set the whole thing up... we planned and we planned... we planned it all out. Just stick to the plan... every time you THINK you mess something UP... [Spoken: overlapping, fragments] ...we... ...can't... ...keep this up... [Outro] [Spoken: distant, fading] ...talk soon... [Vinyl crackle, abrupt stop]

[Dialogue] I can't make out just what sort of a place it was. It seemed to be a gambling house. But there weren't any walls, just a lot of curtains with eyes painted on them. A man was walking around with a large pair of scissors cutting all the drapes in half.

[Intro] [Bells as the alarm goes off, another boring day] [Verse] [Spoken: calm, waking up] ...What day is it??... ...Did I lock the door?... ...Feels like I forgot something... [Spoken: overlapping] ...It's like I'm on autopilot... Bad Autopilot... [Bridge] [Spoken: female, trying to wake up and remember her dream] ...I had a dream but I can't... ...no it's probably nothing [Spoken: female, rationalizing] ...All of my dreams are grey... ...nothing sexy at all. [Chorus] [Spoken: male, breaking but loud] ...I keep looking out the window... and I see nothing. NOTHING!... [Outro] [Spoken: analytical] Coma is defined as a state of deep unconsciousness, an eyes-closed unresponsive state. Coma is usually a transitory state though it may last for an indefinite or even prolonged period. [Spoken: calm, waking up] ...wait... what day is it again?... ...every...damn...day... NOTHING!

[Intro] [Vinyl crackle, then drums HIT — urgent, driving] [Verse] [Spoken: calm, final, cutting through the chaos] ...I've had enough... I've seen some perfect things... but I'm done now... [Chorus] [Spoken: female, panicked] ...the phone just kept ringing, and ringing, and ringing... [Scratch] [Verse] [Spoken: male, desperate] ...I don't understand... [Spoken: overlapping, frantic] ...why didn't they... ...I just saw them... ...they seemed fine... [Bridge] [Spoken: female, screaming through gritted teeth] ...they said it was quick... [Scratch] [Build] [Spoken: male, rage] ...why didn't they call me... [Chorus] [Spoken: female, breaking but loud] ...I never got to say goodbye... ...I never got to say... [Outro] [Spoken: hollow, alone] ...gone... [Single bass note, sustain, vinyl crackle, fade]

"There is a sacredness in tears. They are not the mark of weakness, but of power. They speak more eloquently than ten thousand tongues. They are the messengers of overwhelming grief, of deep contrition, and of unspeakable love." — Washington Irving

[Intro] [Vinyl crackle, muffled, underwater] [Verse] [Spoken: muffled, far away] ...I'm fine... ...I'm fine... [Chorus] [Spoken: clearer, gasping] ...I went to work the next day... [Verse] [Spoken: underwater, numb] ...what else was I supposed to do... [Bridge] [Spoken: breaking through] ...people keep asking... [Spoken: sharp, defensive] ...I don't want to talk about it... [Verse] [Spoken: muffled, sinking] ...just tired... [Chorus] [Spoken: gasping, desperate] ...I'm fine, really... [Outro] [Spoken: distant, giving up] ...anyway... [Spoken: extended, raw] ...I was... ashamed... I didn't want pity... or even sympathy... I was so full of ANGER and SADNESS... Just leave me ALONE. [Spoken: Angry] Just leave me ALONE.

[Intro] [Vinyl crackle] [Verse] [Spoken: theatrical] ...I'm right here... you can't ignore me... I ignore MYSELF! [Spoken: angry] ...I'm not a ghost! [Chorus] [Spoken: deadpan] ...they keep walking right through me... [Scratch] [Spoken: creeping closer] ...it's close to midnight... [Verse] [Spoken: amused] ...rude, honestly... they must think I'm crazy... [Spoken: casual] ...I don't remember getting up this morning... ...but I must have... [Bridge] [Spoken: Dramatic] ...the ghost... of who I used to be... [Spoken: ominous] ...no one's gonna save you now... [Spoken: extended monologue] I remember this one time, I fell off a high wall... I almost died... couldn't breathe for a few minutes. And all I wanted to do was laugh... CRAZY! [Chorus] [Spoken: shrug energy] ...maybe I'm not here... [Scratch] [Spoken: playful threat] ...you're fighting for your life... [Verse] [Spoken: light] ...do dead people cry? asking for a friend... [Spoken: dramatic] ...I'm a skeleton inside... [Spoken: extended monologue] I don't want to be like this anymore... I HATE THIS. [Outro] [Spoken: theatrical whisper] ...see you on the other side... [Spoken: Dry Energy] ...I'll walk the nights alone... [Spoken: maniacal laugh] ...HA HA HA... HAHAHAHAHAHA [Vinyl crackle, creaky door closes, silence]

[Spoken: Extended Narration, Female] My husband and I were supposed to go to Florida for our first vacation since having our child, but my flight was delayed until the next morning. Before going to bed, my husband went to have a cigarette. A loud whooshing sound and a big thud later, two 100-foot oak trees upturned with no warning. The trees crushed our patio table and the only two chairs that were there. We're lucky to be alive.

[Intro] [Sub bass pulse, just heartbeat, building] [Spoken: muttered, to yourself] ...Get up... ...Get up... [Verse] [Spoken: still internal] ...Muscle memory... ...autonomic... ...I like my sugar with coffee and cream? [Spoken: fragments] Gotta get UP! [Spoken: faster, breathing harder] What's outside for again? ...doors closed... [Spoken: overlapping] ...Pins and needles out... heart is racing... [Spoken: staccato] Coat... Keys... Just... [Bridge] [Spoken: calmer now, moving] I remember days like this... [Spoken: extended quote] Walking with a friend in the dark... ...it's better than walking alone in the light... [Outro] [Spoken: fading, walking away] Blood moving... ...FINALLY... ...but my heart is STOPPED...

[Spoken: Extended Narration] "Tears are sometimes an inappropriate response to death. When a life has been lived completely honestly, completely successfully, or just completely, the correct response to death's perfect punctuation mark is a smile." — Julie Burchill

[Intro] [Vinyl crackle, soft drums enter, melancholy groove] [Verse] [Spoken: gentle] ...it's okay... you're safe now... [Spoken: broken] ...I can't do this anymore... [Chorus] [Spoken: quiet] ...I know... I know... [Verse] [Spoken: exhausted] ...I'm so tired of pretending... [Spoken: tender] ...you don't have to here... [Bridge] [Spoken: cracking] ...I miss them so much... [Spoken: holding space] ...I know you do... [Spoken: sobbing] ...it's not fair... [Spoken: whispered] ...no... it's not... [Outro] [Spoken: finally] ...stay with me... [Spoken: present] ...sometimes... sometimes I like to think the pain is a gift... but there's so MUCH PAIN... ...this is no gift... [Vinyl crackle, silence]

[Intro] [Vinyl crackle] [Spoken: female, disgusted] ...what's that smell...ugh... [Verse] [Spoken: French female, innocent over the grit] ...c'est joli, non? ...même ici... [Spoken: female, disgusted] ...this is just awful... awful... [Spoken: male, disgusted] ...Lavender... and Roses... [Scratch] [Spoken: English male, tired] ...still growing... ...in all this shit... [Breakdown] [Drums strip back, bass alone, breathing room] [Outro] [Spoken: male, pleased with himself] ...fellas... I sort of like it... [Spoken: female, disgusted] ...how do people put up with it...

[Verse] [Spoken: frustrated] ...too bright... ...too much... [Scratch] [Spoken: giving up] ...fine... ...FINE... [Breakdown] [Spoken: quieter, surrendering] ...I'm up... ...you win... [Bridge] [Spoken: extended outtake] ...I wanted to come outside... just to get a little air. And... This sunshine is oppressive, I'm telling you... ...I wanted air, not LIGHT... [Outro] [Spoken: almost grateful, almost] ...still too damn bright... [Vinyl hiss, fade]

[Spoken Word] At the end of a long day... it's time to relax. Take a break from your troubles, and just... KICK BACK

[Intro] [Sparse piano, space] [Verse] [Spoken: male] ...sometimes... sometimes you're blind to the future... ...sometimes you can't see even the present... but the future is always there... ...you just have to open your eyes... [Choir: soft, wordless, ahhhs, distant] [Bridge] [Spoken: male] ...sometimes... ...there are times when gratitude is hard to find... [Choir returns, fuller, warm, acceptance] [Spoken: male] ...it's a blessing when it does... [Outro] [Spoken: male] ...I was dead... I was literally dead... [Choir carries it out, fading like breath]

[Intro] [Beat drops, triumphant] [Spoken: Female Voice] "I always thought I was shaking people up, but now I want to go at it more, and I want to go at it more deliberately, and I want to go at it coldly. I want to shake people up" [Chorus] [Choir, joyful but restrained] Still here Still here Long goodbye But I'm still here [Verse] ...I'm still here... [Bridge] [Spoken: gratitude] ...thank you for the dark... ...showed me the light... [Choir: wordless, rising, hint of gospel] Ohhhhh Ohhhhh [Final Chorus] Still here Still here Long goodbye But I'm still here [Spoken: soulful] ...Lord I'm still here... ...The Long Goodbye... [Outro] [Spoken: quiet, final] ...goodbye... ...and thank you... [Spoken: Female Voice] "Everybody is half dead. Everybody avoids everybody. All over the place, in most situations, most all the time. I know." [Fade]

[Chorus] [Tender, simple] After all I love you After all I still do After after all... After after all... [Verse] [Spoken: Female voice] ...I'm still trying to forget that mess... ...My friend just had a BABY!... [Outro] [Fading, peaceful] After all... After all... [Sound of waves falling into the beach...]